they play head games with me. well, at least people tell me they do. they will tell me this, and then take it back. then give it to me again, but then take it back. time after time i sit and wonder how much longer it will go on, and whether or not i should just give up and give in. sit there and not care what happens, let it happen without a fight. let everything happen. give in to what makes me feel better at that exact moment instead of do what is right for me in the long run. i will sit there, and do something stupid. get yelled at, make mistakes, but will continue with it. it will be my little secret, for only a little time until someone see's what is really going on.